Supporting Teens Through the Under-16 Social Media Ban: A Gentle Parenting Guide for Mums

As the new social media restrictions for under-16s come into effect, many mums are anticipating big emotions, strong reactions, or uncertainty from their teens. Change—especially one that impacts daily routines and social connection—can feel unsettling for young people. The good news? You don’t need to have all the answers. What your teen needs most right now is your calm, your connection, and your consistency.

1. Normalising the Transition

For many teens, social media has been a major source of entertainment, identity expression, and peer connection. Losing sudden access can feel like a genuine loss.

You can support them by gently naming their experience:

• “This is a big change, and it makes sense that you’re feeling frustrated.”

• “It’s okay to feel out of sorts while your brain adjusts.”

Validating their feelings reduces shame, lowers defensiveness, and opens the door to collaboration rather than conflict.

2. Co-Creating New Routines

Teens cope better with change when they feel involved in the process. Instead of setting strict new rules without input, invite them into the conversation where appropriate.

You might explore:

• Alternative activities that support wellbeing—offline gaming with friends, sport, creative hobbies, in-person hangouts

• Family rhythms that reduce the constant pull of screens

• Warm but firm expectations, such as:
  “I hear that this is hard. The rule still stands, and I’m here to help you through it.”

This strengthens trust and reduces power struggles during the transition.

3. Supporting Emotional Ups and Downs

As their brains recalibrate, you can expect mood shifts, boredom, irritability, or restlessness. This is temporary and expected.

A gentle-parenting approach focuses on:

• Curiosity: “What feels hardest right now?”

• Compassion: “I get why this feels tough.”

• Containment: “Your feelings are welcome. You don’t have to hide them.”

These responses help your teen feel safe, even when emotions are big.

4. You Don’t Need to Convince Your Teen

Many mums feel pressure to justify or persuade their teen that this rule is “the right thing.”

But in reality:

• You don’t need your teen to agree.

• You don’t need them to like it.

• You don’t need to convince them.

Your role is to hold the boundary while supporting their emotions—not to win an argument.

Endless explaining often leads to debates, defensiveness, or self-doubt. Instead, anchor yourself in statements such as:

• “This rule is in place, and I am here to support you through the feelings that come up.”

• “You don’t have to agree with the decision to follow it.”

• “I can handle your frustration without changing the boundary.”

This communicates safety and stability—two things teens deeply need, especially when they push against limits.

5. A Message to Mums: Support, Don’t Rescue

It’s natural to want to protect your teen from discomfort. But your job is not to remove their frustration—it’s to support them through it in a grounded, compassionate way.

You can remind yourself:

• “My teen’s feelings are valid, but not mine to fix.”

• “I can be caring without rescuing.”

• “Their frustration doesn’t mean I’m doing something wrong.”

This mindset builds resilience in your teen—and in you.

6. Take Care of You Too

This change affects the whole family, not just your teen. The emotional labour mums carry during transitions can be significant. Self-care is not indulgent here—it’s essential.

Some reminders:

• Your calm is contagious, but it needs refilling.

• You’re allowed to take breaks from emotionally heavy conversations.

• You can lean on your community, partner, or professionals for support.

• Good enough really is enough.

When you care for your wellbeing, you model the kind of coping your teen most needs to see.

7. Ending Encouragement

This transition is temporary. Teens adapt faster than we often expect. You don’t need to be perfect—you only need to be steady, kind, and connected.

With warmth and firm boundaries, this change can become an opportunity for growth, reconnection, and resilience within your family.

If You Need Support

If you’re navigating this transition and would like guidance from a psychologist, Evolve Wellbeing Psychology is here to help. Our team supports teens and parents through change with evidence-based, compassionate care.